Not Just Broke…Phone Bill Broke

A few months ago, I was broke. But not just any broke: but phone bill broke.

A Difference Of Opinion

Rogers, my mobile phone provider, sent me an iPhone and allowed me to use it for 4 months. One day, they called me out of the blue,

Rogers Rep: Uh, we kinda let you have a phone, and um…we fear that you might be under the impression that automatically dismissing our calls is some sort of currency you can use in lieu legal tender to pay the bill…
Me: Yeah, I know. You see, I didn’t realize that I could watch the, ‘Best Fail Videos Of All Time Volumes 1-10′ in high definition through YouTube when you sent me the phone…’

As it would turn out, that’s not exactly a compelling argument if you’re trying to keep your phone connected. So, they cut me off, and my beautiful iPhone was reduced to an iPod. However, being the glass is half-full kind of guy, I affectionately called it my iPad Mini.

Excuses Between Friends

The worst was having your friends ask you what happened to your phone…

My friend: Yo dude tried to call ya, said it was disconnected or something?
Me: Yeah man, fuckin Rogers man…tried to overcharge me on some shit…I’m arguing with them right now…yo, for now, call me on this number…

The number I gave them? Oh, it was my mom’s phone…that’s right: I was a 29-year old male using my mom’s cell.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to suavely explain why your mom’s name comes up when you call a girl you’re trying to get with? I was getting cock blocked Caller Display.

D’oh! Ok…they can’t all be winners, arite? This is Michael Jagdeo, signing off for Day #5 in my 20-Day Writing Challenge,

About Michael Jagdeo

My name's Michael Jagdeo, and I refuse to write about myself in the third person. I'm a Comedian from Toronto, Ontario, Canada. In addition to honing my stand-up comedy act, I maintain this blog and write the weekly comedy article for blogTO.com.
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2 Responses to Not Just Broke…Phone Bill Broke

    • Hey Mike!

      Thanks man. Ever have one of those ideas where it’s so much funnier spoken than it is written? That’s how I felt about this one. It’s like the formality of text got in the way of the playful, self-deprecation.

      But perhaps my writing skill isn’t at the level to write the bit out by text properly (as opposed to saying it in stage without a defined script)…who knows.

      The beautiful thing about writing new material is the exquisite ambiguity of it all…will it bomb, kill, work the first time, etc.?

      Today is a new day, though! And if we’ve made them laugh before, we can sure as hell hit that spot again!!!

      Jagdeo

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