I order Coke instead of beer when I go to comedy clubs because it would be way too expensive and beer tastes icky. Alas, it’s pretty much the most pussy thing you can do when sitting on a bar stool. This is a series of posts documenting my neurosis surrounding ordering Coke.
A Man walks into a bar and orders a Coke…
Ordering coke is my norm (clearly, not ‘the norm’), and I coolly respond, “Um, I’ll just have a coke for now” when the bartendress asks me what I’d like. You gotta pretend that you’re starting slow so it doesn’t seem like you’re five years old at McDonalds and your parents are asking you what drink you’d like with your Happy Meal. Michael McLean points out that there’s a guy drinking a Coke at the bar, and that it is not a good sign. Even I, said guy with Coke, have to laugh at that one. Hey, at least it’s not cranberry juice.
Stay Black (thanks to Joey Diaz for that one)