Living My Dreams

Dear Diary,

During this morning’s audition, one of the the Casting Directors asked me,

what are your dreams

I paused for a split-second, chuckled, and replied,

living my dreams

I didn’t always feel that way about how my life turned out…

High School Reunion

envy

A few months ago, I saw an old high school acquaintance in the mall with her husband. I didn’t say hi because I anticipated the questions about what I was doing for a living. In particular, I didn’t want to answer her with Comedian because it felt like I was admitting that I had failed in my bid to become a businessman.

I walked around the mall for awhile, feeling really shitty about myself for being embarrassed…embarrassed?!?! About what? Following my dreams?!?!? I eventually started to look behind the pain, and asked myself,

the fear of following your dreams

Eventually, I realized that because I wasn’t as monetarily successful as she was, I was taking that to mean that there must be something inherently inferior about me. I realized that I had unknowingly put an expectation on my shoulders that if I wasn’t wealthy, I shouldn’t be happy or proud of myself.

Tat Tvam Asi (I Am That)

But that’s not the case anymore. Today, when that Casting Director asked me what my dreams were, I didn’t hesitate: I told her that I was already living them. It was at that point when I realized that I had finally stopped aspiring to be something I never really wanted to be in the first place (see About Me for the full story).

I love where I am right now. Everyday, I get up, grab a coffee, and proceed to make myself laugh until my head hits the pillow. I wouldn’t change my career choices for all of the money in the world.

And hey, if you’re out there, chasing money like I once did, I’d like to repeat what a millionaire once told me as I took a seat in his humble Mazda 3,

at the end of the day, you only get to sit in one chair

Word to Big Bird.

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About Michael Jagdeo

My name's Michael Jagdeo, and I refuse to write about myself in the third person. I'm a Comedian from Toronto, Ontario, Canada. In addition to honing my stand-up comedy act, I maintain this blog and write the weekly comedy article for blogTO.com.
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